Sunday, November 23, 2008



Tonight my ex- gave a small birthday party for me. No one else thought to do that. On the other hand when I was there I saw a pair of pewter candlesticks I gave her thirty years ago. She had put them in her garage.

Now that I think of it, it is stupid, stupid, stupid that I should care an iota. Once I gave them to her they became hers to do whatever she wanted with them. She is entitled to throw them out if she likes. The real reason one gives candlesticks or anything else is to discharge the social obligation to give a gift. It is not uncommon that the giver doesn't want to give the gift and the recipient doesn't want to receive it. Yet we continue to give and receive, holiday after holiday.

To be a sulky child because one's present does not have a place of honor forever after is idiotic. So why bring it up? Because one is sometimes a sulky child, an idiot?


  1. Buying a gift for a nephew's wife because you happen to be there on her birthday, that is the obligatory gift that you don't really care what happens to it. Giving a gift to the woman you love, that is so different. There are so many thing you want to get her, so many things to share. Clothes, jewelry, intimate things, books, trips, art. You chose candlesticks. Very symbolic, both a religious item and a social item. Your mother had candlestick, as did your grandmother. The candlesticks in the garage wasn't your gift tossed aside, but your dreams of the future tossed aside. You're not a sulky childish idiot, you're a hurt romantic.

  2. Nick Danger2:21 PM

    Gotta be careful in the futures market.

  3. Anonymous3:49 AM

    You are a retard.

  4. To Anonymous:
    Can't we just agree on "charming naif"?